Imagine Punching John Lennon in the Nose
My wife and I watch this dumb reality tv show "INXS Rock Star," in which contestants vie to be the next lead singer of INXS. Now, I never really liked INXS's music, but the show is kinda interesting. In my opinion, only one of the contestants has any real talent and last night she sang very well (after totally blowing it last week). The only problem is that she sang one of my most hated songs, "Imagine" by John Lennon. The song chafes my butt so badly that I'm rewriting the lyrics for my own benefit:
Imagine there's a heaven
It's easy if you try
Something to actually live for
Because eventually you will die
Imagine all the people
Knowing why we're here
Imagine a real Constitution
It isn't hard to do
Government restrained by a document
And the Second Amendment too
Imagine all the people
Living with liberty
Imagine there's no donuts
I wonder if you can
No need for chocolate frosting
A brotherhood of bland
Imagine all the people
With nothing else to do...
You may say this song is stupid
and you'd not be the only one
But now it's permanent on the internet
And in a million years someone will read it
and let's hope still think it's stupid too.
Boy, that stunk up the place. But at least it's no worse than the original, in the author's opinion.
Imagine there's a heaven
It's easy if you try
Something to actually live for
Because eventually you will die
Imagine all the people
Knowing why we're here
Imagine a real Constitution
It isn't hard to do
Government restrained by a document
And the Second Amendment too
Imagine all the people
Living with liberty
Imagine there's no donuts
I wonder if you can
No need for chocolate frosting
A brotherhood of bland
Imagine all the people
With nothing else to do...
You may say this song is stupid
and you'd not be the only one
But now it's permanent on the internet
And in a million years someone will read it
and let's hope still think it's stupid too.
Boy, that stunk up the place. But at least it's no worse than the original, in the author's opinion.
3 Comments:
I dunno, I kinda liked your version. :)
Ah, you're American.
Probably one of those religious nuts who threw a pissy fit when Lennon made the Jesus comment.
Religious nut? At the time of writing that my silly version of that song I was an agnostic. I always hated that song, even back when I was an atheist/agnostic. As a Christian, I don't hate it at all, just dislike it from an artistic point of view.
As for Lennon's "Jesus comment," I do not know which comment it is to which you refer. Boy, this was almost 4 years ago. Thanks for reminding me :)
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