Wednesday, April 02, 2008

Top Five Reasons I'm Glad I'm Not a Woman

I was just reading this article, and yet another reason I'm thankful God made me a man got added to the pile. Here's my top five:

1. I'll never have a legitimate reason to use a sperm donor.

2. I don't have to endure a monthly psycho freak-out. Well at least I don't have to be the one freaking out. To receive is far better than to give in this case.

3. I prefer The Unit to Desperate Housewives. There's a pun or gay joke in there somewhere.

4. I was able to get along with my mother.

5. I can't relate to "The Vagina Monologues."

I did get in trouble once for starting a conversation at the poker table with "So I was watching Oprah..." I stopped right there, but it was too late. Never mind that my wife was watching Oprah and I just popped in to sit with her for a while, oh no. I will never live that down.


Blogger Stickwick Stapers said...

Well, I'm glad God made me a woman! Here's my top-five:

1. I'm not expected to be the defender of my family/spouse or country (unless the S totally HTF).

2. I'm not expected to do any dangerous/physically arduous jobs.

3. I'm not expected to be the breadwinner.

4. I got to be a daddy's girl.

5. And let me just point out that we women have the better end of the marriage deal. I think if I had to figure out how to please a wife, I'd just take the easy road and kill myself.

4/02/2008 8:00 PM  

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